THE introduction of chapter one of the book titled Outcasted by commercial model, writer, life, relationship coach; and accountant Amanda Mutabeni read: “Trauma can be caused by anything that makes us feel helpless or unsafe. Sexual, physical or verbal abuse, domestic violence, an unstable or unsafe environment, parental separation, neglect, bullying or a serious illness are all examples of events that can cause trauma.
“In actual fact, we are all damaged in some way, by different things and at different times! We have all faced some kind of trauma in our lives and there is need to fix ourselves up for our own sake, our children’s sake, and for the betterment of the next generation.”
The above assertion appears to be the reality in many people’s lives to a great extent. People have all passed through some stages and experiences during the childhood phase that have moulded them to become the person they are in this society.
Because people are living in an imperfect world, it is undeniable they have some childhood traumas which have positively or negatively built their character. The recently published Outcasted, is a book for everyone.
Mutabeni believes the book is an antidote to the struggles caused by our childhood traumas.
The book, comprising 10 chapters, covers a wide range of topics on causes of traumatic experiences in childhood life that have shaped people’s view of the world while negatively affecting their personality.
The book, through its characters in various anecdotes, has done justice as it articulates how some of the people end up being outcasts in society because of the past traumas they suffered.
In the closing chapter, Mutabeni gave solutions to people who have gone through different childhood traumas.
- Model-cum-author confronts childhood trauma
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It is a must-read book as most of the readers are likely to come across characters with similar experiences as theirs, and most importantly there are solutions that could help them to find peace, solace and improved personality.
Mutabeni told NewsDay Life & Style that she was inspired by the need to mend broken souls that have been affected by childhood traumas.
“I have come to realise that most people have been hurt deeply by their own family members when they were children or adolescents, and these wounds never really heal because such issues are never really talked about.
“However, these issues create trauma within us which influences the people we become as we grow up because we tend to develop forms of defence mechanisms to deal with the trauma. But in reality, the trauma we went through in our past affects our characters, our relationships, our careers, our happiness, our health, and the way we socialise with other people,” she noted.
“So, through the book, I really wanted to address the types of circumstances within family set-ups that lead to children being traumatised and growing up to become bruised adults. Also, I wanted people to see the linkage between the people we are today and what we were put through by our families.”
The 25-year-old Mutabeni said her main goal was to stop the cycle of a hurting generation.
“What I wanted to achieve through the book is to address the inner wounds and struggles that have moulded us to be the people we are today. I wanted to raise awareness to people that some experiences in our lives are actually childhood trauma and they have to be dealt with to avoid hurting other people or creating another hurt generation,” she explained.
“I wanted to provide healing to those who read the book, and this goes to everyone who is deeply hurt by their past. This is the reason why this book has a free e-copy.”
Mutabeni said feedback was tremendous because many people could relate to Outcasted.
“Some are even stating that the book is really meant for them and despite it (book) being a free e-book, I am happy that my readers still want to purchase the hard copies. It is really a successful project honestly. There is nothing that is more soothing than knowing that someone is actually feeling better due to the words you penned down on paper,” she noted.
Mutabeni believes childhood is the most important stage of a person, hence the reason she focused on childhood traumas.
“If children are loved, they will show love back, but if their childhood is ruined, their lives will be ruined for eternity,” she said.
Mutabeni said she realised she had a talent for writing after her colleagues in a social media group, The Relationship Hub urged her to take writing seriously.
“I always enjoyed writing short stories and interacting with people whether virtually or physically. So, after the motivation from my colleagues, I began taking this talent seriously to work on actual books,” she said.
So far Mutabeni has published three books namely, The Realities of Modern-Day Dating (a question-and-answer book about relationships nowadays), Becoming The Model (a handbook and guide for models and aspiring models) and Outcasted (a book fighting childhood trauma).
